Future fears

By Deonna Jones
LifeAtStart.com reporter

I have many fears in life and some of them I have overcome, but most of them I’m pretty much still dealing with. The main one has to be my fear of what happens after high school. My whole life has been directed up until now, and I don’t have any control over my decisions, meaning that when the adults stop controlling what I do and how I do it.  When they take the control away from me, every problem I come across is like a huge question mark. Even a simple thing such as waking up for school, is getting harder because I don’t have my mom breathing down my neck about being to school on time. All of this has me thinking about how life will treat me after I’m done and graduated from high school.

My whole life I’ve been sheltered, so I never really knew a lot about responsibility and it shows now that I’m a young adult. I still feel the need to depend on my parents and older peers for everything which is why I’m so afraid of leaving for college and being alone, but if I don’t leave I feel like I won’t grow up. How will I prepare myself to grow up if everyday I’m being directed on what to do? For example, I have to arrive at school everyday,  told how to do this, and how not to do this. Although this gives me a great guide on following rules or deal with the consequence, it doesn’t give many chances for freedom which is what I need to bump my own head and learn from my mistakes.

I’ve been spending most of my time researching how people live after high school and most say they’re basically forced by going to college and leaving their parents’ home, and living on their own. My understanding is that maybe that’s not always the best choice seeing how my generation is living today. After taking the time out to write this article, I think I’ve found the best plan for me. I will be taking some time off to travel, and hopefully this will help me come to a conclusion on how I want to spend the rest of my life and I’m hoping that this will help me define who I really am. I may be all over the place, but I’m not truly done finding out who I really am or what I really want to do. I guess what I’m trying to say is life after high school is going to be changing and it’s my choice to decide if it’s going to be for better or worse.